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all te jokes are cool guys, very funny, specially the ones posted by crazycat
+7
zinam
im_hummer_freak
anjan
Crazy cat
thackervijay
archit
Vibhor
11 posters
The jokes thread!
napster- Posts : 1777
Location : Hyderabad
Vibhor- Posts : 2754
Location : -
Hows this? I found it very funny!! :lol!:
archit- Posts : 940
Location : Bangkok
haha, that is a good one vibhor!
really really funny
F13!
really really funny
F13!
autodude sparsh- Posts : 231
Location : New Delhi
HOW TO MAKE A MARUTI OMNI AT HOME
Materials required
A maruti 800
A huge tin box
a steering wheel
4 tyres
a switchgear
a stepeny
a plastic panel
some sheets of glass
Now, first we place the Tin box at an elevated height.
Now make 4 slots and insert the wheels at a tiny wheelbase and such that they can rotate easily.
Now drill the tin box such, that you get two tiny doors to enter.
Now paint the full tin box.
Take some bulbs and make the headlights, taillights, indicators.
Make the ORVM and IRVM using plastic and glass.
Now enter the Tin box and add the plastic panel on the front side.
Insert the Steering wheel and switch gear.
Now make a hole on the below of the driver seat and add M800's engine.
Pluck seats from some cars [ including your M800] and put it accordingly in the Tin Box.
Use your sheets of glass with some glue and add the windshield and windows.
WALLA!!!
Your Homemade Maruti Omni is ready!!!! :lol: :lol!: :laugh:
Materials required
A maruti 800
A huge tin box
a steering wheel
4 tyres
a switchgear
a stepeny
a plastic panel
some sheets of glass
Now, first we place the Tin box at an elevated height.
Now make 4 slots and insert the wheels at a tiny wheelbase and such that they can rotate easily.
Now drill the tin box such, that you get two tiny doors to enter.
Now paint the full tin box.
Take some bulbs and make the headlights, taillights, indicators.
Make the ORVM and IRVM using plastic and glass.
Now enter the Tin box and add the plastic panel on the front side.
Insert the Steering wheel and switch gear.
Now make a hole on the below of the driver seat and add M800's engine.
Pluck seats from some cars [ including your M800] and put it accordingly in the Tin Box.
Use your sheets of glass with some glue and add the windshield and windows.
WALLA!!!
Your Homemade Maruti Omni is ready!!!! :lol: :lol!: :laugh:
napster- Posts : 1777
Location : Hyderabad
lol.. :lol:
ill make this one today, nice DIY dude :jump:
ill make this one today, nice DIY dude :jump:
thackervijay- Posts : 1812
Location : Ahmedabad
Crazy cat wrote:Just reviving an old thread
Try to answer these :jump:
1. How can you drop an egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
2. It it took 8 men 10 hours to build a wall, how long it would take 4 men to build it?
3. How can you lift an Elephant with one hand?
4. How can man spend 8 days without sleep?
5. If you throw red stone in the blue sea, what it will become?
6. In which state is the Bay of Bengal
Answers:
1. Concrete floor are very hard to crack
2. No time required as it is already built
3. Its not a problem, since there is no elephant with one hand
4. No problem, he sleeps at night
5. It will get wet and sunk
6. Liquid state
lol.. :lol!: nice one buddy, but as RR said you should have given those answers later, anyways keep them coming.
archit- Posts : 940
Location : Bangkok
Why Newton Committed Suicide.....?
Once, Newton came to India and watched a few
Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was
convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were
just a huge pile of junk and apologized
for everything he had done.
In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was
confused to such an extent that he went
paranoid.
Here are a few scenes..................................
1)Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which,
according
to the doctors can't be cured and his death
is imminent.In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth
is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet
passes through his ears taking away the tumor along
with it and he is cured!
LongLive Rajanikanth!
2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted
with 3 gangsters.Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately
only one bullet and a knife.
Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle
gangster?& shoots
the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the
bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both
the gangsters on
each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the
middle one.
3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster.
Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in
it.
Guess, what he does. Nah? not even in your remotest imaginations.
He waits for the gangster to shoot.
As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajanikanth opens
the
bullet compartment of his revolver and catches
thebullet. Then, he
closes the bullet compartment
and fires his gun.
Bang...
the
gangster dies...
This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go
back. But he happened
to see another movie for onelast time, and thought
that at
least one movie would follow his theory of physics
The
whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in
the world [/i]hasn't changed. Oops, not
so fast!
The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know
that
the villain is on the
other side of a very high wall. So high
that Rajanikanth can't jump even if
he tries like one of those
superman techniques that our heroes normally
use.
Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because
it's
the climax.
(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually
impossible?)
Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets.
He throws one gun in the air and
when the gun has reached
above the height of the wall, he
uses the second gun and shoots
at the trigger of the first gun in air.
The first gun fires off
and the villain is dead.
Newton commits suicide
Once, Newton came to India and watched a few
Tamil movies that had his head spinning. He was
convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were
just a huge pile of junk and apologized
for everything he had done.
In the movie of Rajanikanth, Newton was
confused to such an extent that he went
paranoid.
Here are a few scenes..................................
1)Rajanikanth has a Brain Tumor which,
according
to the doctors can't be cured and his death
is imminent.In one of the fights, our great Rajanikanth
is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the bullet
passes through his ears taking away the tumor along
with it and he is cured!
LongLive Rajanikanth!
2) In another movie, Rajanikanth is confronted
with 3 gangsters.Rajanikanth has a gun but unfortunately
only one bullet and a knife.
Guess, what he does? He throws the knife at the middle
gangster?& shoots
the bullet towards the knife. The knife cuts the
bullet into 2 pieces, which kills both
the gangsters on
each side of the middle gangster & the knife kills the
middle one.
3) Rajanikanth is chased by a gangster.
Rajanikanth has a revolver but no bullets in
it.
Guess, what he does. Nah? not even in your remotest imaginations.
He waits for the gangster to shoot.
As soon as the gangster shoots, Rajanikanth opens
the
bullet compartment of his revolver and catches
thebullet. Then, he
closes the bullet compartment
and fires his gun.
Bang...
the
gangster dies...
This was too much for our Newton to take! He was completely shaken and decided to go
back. But he happened
to see another movie for onelast time, and thought
that at
least one movie would follow his theory of physics
The
whole movie goes fine and Newton is happy that all in
the world [/i]hasn't changed. Oops, not
so fast!
The 'climax' finally arrives. Rajanikanth gets to know
that
the villain is on the
other side of a very high wall. So high
that Rajanikanth can't jump even if
he tries like one of those
superman techniques that our heroes normally
use.
Rajanikanth has to desperately kill the villain because
it's
the climax.
(Newton dada is smiling since it is virtually
impossible?)
Rajanikanth suddenly pulls two guns from his pockets.
He throws one gun in the air and
when the gun has reached
above the height of the wall, he
uses the second gun and shoots
at the trigger of the first gun in air.
The first gun fires off
and the villain is dead.
Newton commits suicide
Last edited by Vibhor on 30th July 2009, 3:21 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Please take time to properly format your posts.)
napster- Posts : 1777
Location : Hyderabad
LOL 
great joke man, rajinikanth one was awesome
great joke man, rajinikanth one was awesome
Crazy cat- Posts : 2587
Location : Coimbatore
@archit, i never knew Rajni has acted these shots. 
But for more fun, you can check the video of Vijaykanth
But for more fun, you can check the video of Vijaykanth
archit- Posts : 940
Location : Bangkok
that is hilarious!! 
very funny indeed!
very funny indeed!
archit- Posts : 940
Location : Bangkok
here is one!
sorry it is in hindi!
Angry boss: Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?
> Executive (sar jhukate hue): Nahin sir.
> Boss: Niche kya dekh rahe ho ? Meri taraf dekho
sorry it is in hindi!
Angry boss: Tumne kabhi Ullu dekha hai?
> Executive (sar jhukate hue): Nahin sir.
> Boss: Niche kya dekh rahe ho ? Meri taraf dekho
thackervijay- Posts : 1812
Location : Ahmedabad
ha ha ha nice one archit, thats the reality of rajnikant movies and the stunts he does or rather director makes him perform surely he himself would be laughing at it.Newton surely was going to suicide. 
napster- Posts : 1777
Location : Hyderabad
there is a hero in telugu movies, even that guy has similar talents, he can stop a running train 
his name is balakrishna
his name is balakrishna
Road Rocket- Posts : 918
Location : India
The video is really funny!!RoadRocket
Crazy cat- Posts : 2587
Location : Coimbatore
These are imaginary shots buddy. Rajni has never acted these scenes anyway.thackervijay wrote:ha ha ha nice one archit, thats the reality of rajnikant movies and the stunts he does or rather director makes him perform surely he himself would be laughing at it.Newton surely was going to suicide.
archit- Posts : 940
Location : Bangkok
here is one!
An Indian lady (NRI) returned from the US to India and is window-shopping in Chandigarh.
Suddenly
she realizes she is late for an appointment. She isn't wearing a watch
so she sees a small shop on the roadside and asks in a
very American accent of the sardar owner 'Wot's the tyme?'
The
sardar is a very patriotic man and hates desis / Indians who
put on a foreign accent. He replies in the same American accent,
'Bra-panties.'
Confused the lady asks again, 'No! No! Wot's the tyme?'
The sardar again answers back, in the same accent, 'Bra-panties.'
Seeing
the confusion between the two, another sardar comes to the
rescue of the lady and says, 'O papaji, tusi samajh nahin paaye'' Kudi
twade ko puuch rahii hai, kinna time hua!!'
Translation: Papaji, dont you understand what the lady is asking? What is the time?
The angry sardar shouts back at him, 'Paji, tow main bhi
to oonoo time hee Bata rahan hu? barah payntis (12.35). Translation: Friend, I am also telling her the time! Barah is 12 and 35 is payntis is
An Indian lady (NRI) returned from the US to India and is window-shopping in Chandigarh.
Suddenly
she realizes she is late for an appointment. She isn't wearing a watch
so she sees a small shop on the roadside and asks in a
very American accent of the sardar owner 'Wot's the tyme?'
The
sardar is a very patriotic man and hates desis / Indians who
put on a foreign accent. He replies in the same American accent,
'Bra-panties.'
Confused the lady asks again, 'No! No! Wot's the tyme?'
The sardar again answers back, in the same accent, 'Bra-panties.'
Seeing
the confusion between the two, another sardar comes to the
rescue of the lady and says, 'O papaji, tusi samajh nahin paaye'' Kudi
twade ko puuch rahii hai, kinna time hua!!'
Translation: Papaji, dont you understand what the lady is asking? What is the time?
The angry sardar shouts back at him, 'Paji, tow main bhi
to oonoo time hee Bata rahan hu? barah payntis (12.35). Translation: Friend, I am also telling her the time! Barah is 12 and 35 is payntis is
